Gifts.

It's sad how early you have to start Christmas shopping now. It's early November, and I already feel behind because I haven't bought anything yet (although I did start tagging gift ideas to Delicious a few months ago). My problem is that I want to find the perfect gift for everyone, preferably with few or no hints. Even when I'm fortunate to get a wish list from someone (seriously, people, make a wish list and save your loved ones a lot of grief), I feel a little lame using it. Deep down, I fear that people won't really know I love them unless I instinctively know what they want most. Of course, this leads to total shopping paralysis and eventually throwing giftcards at everyone on December 24th. Then, like Charlie Brown trying to kick the football, I vow that I'll do better next year.

I wouldn't say that I'm a "gifts" person – acts of service is probably my primary love language, although I appreciate them all. But it thrills me when someone gives me a perfect gift that I never thought to ask for (or even one I did ask for). To me it means that they really see me for who I am. So it frustrates me when I can't do that for others. You could say it's a foreign love language to me, one I can understand but don't speak very well. :P I really dislike stuff for the sake of stuff, especially at Christmas. I want to give things that are useful, meaningful, and personal. Not things I picked up at the Target Dollar Spot in a moment of panic.

This year, I want to stop the cycle of insanity, but I can already feel the stress mounting. The only solution I can think of is to start early to allow more time for good ideas. But I'm already running out of time.